Monday, December 21, 2009

YOU'RE PRETTY....FOR A DARK SKINNED GIRL


THOSE THAT KNOW ME PERSONALLY,BEFORE READING THIS REMEMBER I AM A BLACK WOMAN BEFORE ANYTHING ELSE! THESE ARE JUST MY EXPERIENCES AND OPINIONS DON'T TAKE OFFENSE,IF YOU DO...YOU OBVIOUSLY DON'T KNOW ME LIKE YOU THOUGHT YOU DID AND SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN PRESENT IN THE 1ST PLACE!


THIS VIDEO IS FROM AUGUST 4 2009 (and to think, they tell me I make something out of nothing ):












In just 10days before the turn of the decade,Brown skin v Light Skin is still an issue in the African American community. It's a damn shame,because regardless, to any other race when they look at us,whether light,carmel,brown,or amethyst,they see a BLACK PERSON!!! So I'm not sure who told my community that being proud that they are lighter with a "better" grade of hair makes them better than the race. Well NEWS FLASH ingrates,listen up I have a few things to say.


Light skin being considered "better" derives from slavery. The slave masters brainwashed their slaves into thinking if they looked more like them,then they were better. In fact lighter skinned slaves were often referred to as 'house slaves',while the darker complected slaves were known as 'field slaves'. Differences being exactly what the terms imply. Lighter slaves worked in and lived in the house with the master because they were considered of a better breed. Darker slaves were subjected to more appalling living conditions outside with poor shelter from the weather and its sometimes not so friendly conditions.

Light skinned slaves were also more accepted because often times they were bi-racial.The African-American women as a whole were raped by their slavemasters to reproduce more slaves. The product of an African-American and Caucasian... is a light,curly head baby. Which was then used as yet another tool to beat and tear the race apart. It was as if the punk ass slave owners yelled from their highest plantation porch step and said 'Hey dark niggers,you see this light skinned,curly headed half nigger?? well he's better than you because he has some me in him and we'll be sure to remind you of that every day for the rest of history!!!!!!!!!!" The life of Dorothy Dandridge and John M. Stahl's 1934 'Imitation of Life' are the perfect references to what,I am speaking of.

Some may say why does this 24yr old milk-chocolate young woman have such a disposition on something that happened so many years before her existence? Almost a BlackPantherness to her. Answer: it's not something that only happened previous to my existence,and I AM a Black Panther born in the wrong era. Picture it Omaha,NE 1997a group of 4 light skinned 'popular chicks' in my jr high tell me "i'm not sh!t because i'm not light skinned with hair" they tell my bf at the time right in front of me "why are you with her,she is black,and ugly and has no hair" THIS IS 1997 PEOPLE!!! Previous to that debocale,I'd NEVER encountered such bullshit in my life!! I mean I was 12 years old so by this time I had interacted with my fair share of 'redbones' (another term uesd by my community to describe a 'yellowbone' or light skinned person). I'd even been told "you're pretty for a dark-skinned girl" (whatever the hell that means). However this was something new to me. How was I to react to that? I didn't know how,so I resorted to what has always worked for me...I'll just hate you and anything like you until I can hate no more!!!

The day finally did come,about 3yrs ago. When I woke up one morning and realized I was a be-a-youtiful Black woman. When you begin to love yourself,to hate anyone else for any reason other than rape or murder seems childish. However previous to the love I found within myself,for myself,I hated light skinned women so much for a long time.One time in 11th grade I told a group of 3 light skinned girls "i hated them,and i'd beat all they asses right here right now,just off gp of them being light skinned" my friends stared at me in such amazment,but not one dared to say anything to go against what I was saying at the time,for they knew just how serious I was and how deeply effected I had been by the situation 4years earlier.It was something that never left my mind, something that always hurt. The ironic thing of it all is that throughout that time period of me despising light skinned women, I only dated light skinned men. Not on purpose they just were always the one to grab my eye, then it dawned on me, I only wanted the yellow dudes because their counterpart made me feel like shit! Strange state of affairs in and of itself,but it was what it was.

As a supporter of DeWayne Michael Carter(Lil Wayne)'s music since his debut in the late 90's, I struggle with listening to his newer music,as it always has a reference to him being in search of a "long hair,thick,redbone". This is a disease that has been lying dormant in the African American community for decades,centuries even. Rappers like Wayne and his cohorts have just gotten the syringe and injected everyone with it. I guess I'll never understand or grasp what the mystery behind a RB is,and I'm not sure I want to. It seems like something that is so shallow,that only a fool would feed into. I wonder if Wayne knows that not even 70yrs ago companies were advertising: soap,lotions and lightening creams with slogans and headings that that were not discreet on what their intentions were. To separate and demean our race once again! Even now you can walk in Wal-Mart and go to the African-American products and there you'll find numerous "skin-lightening" products.What is that about?!?!?

My Black brothas often say they want a light skinned women so their kids will have 'good hair'. What's good hair,you ask? Hair that can be touched by water and curl as opposed to those of us with African gene that runs a little deeper,we have much maintenence for our strands. Be that as it may 'good hair' is another way to separate the community. It pains me to hear those words from the men that I've been taught to love since pampers' mouth. However all I can do is embrace my race as a whole and hope one day we will get past this severance and truly unite as a community.

Hands down BLACK IS BE-A-YOU-TIFUL! All shades, and creeds.Stop letting the man fool you! If Obama was to be thrown out of is presidency and slavery was some how brought back to life....LIGHT SKINNED PEOPLE...YOU'D BE ENSLAVED TOO. YES YOU'D BE A HOUSE SLAVE BUT ...YOU'D BE A SLAVE ALL THE SAME!!!! Stop discriminating against your own. We deal with that enough in our everyday society from those that look nothing like us. Those that have never and will never feel our struggle,ifsofactso can't match our hustle. All im sayin is we all we got out here,act like it!!!

Monday, December 14, 2009

I Don't Know Hip Hop?






Those 10yrs my senior tell me I don't know anything about hip hop,or the 80's.I tell them you must not know me...

I believe there is a common misconception of the difference between Hip Hop and Rap. The Dewayne Wayne Kid (generation as I like to refer to the my generation those born in the mid-late 80's.) We are often the ones lost in the interpretation. At the turn of the decade we were born into the transition of Hip Hop to Rap.Its easy to see why one may confuse the two. By dictionary definition Hip Hop is:popular music, art, and dance: a form of popular culture that started in African American inner-city areas, CHARACTERIZED BY RAP, graffiti art, and breakdancing.


By that definition,Hip Hop is the product,Rap is to be the marketing& business dept with successful ways to sell a quality product. Hip Hop is the artist,Rap is the A&R Rep that is to find a way to make the public love it. By that definition Rap has failed Hip Hop tremendously.Hip Hop is similar to a Bad Boy artist,signed but producing not one track,collecting dust,when they do debut they fall apart due to lack of foundation,structure,quality. Which is combined with a number of others who like them feel they are the star,this organization would be nothing without me. Well I'm sorry to tell you Rap,Hip Hop went and got their lawyer and their back to air you out and sue you for copyright-infringement. They've been tapping the radio waves,booths and your whack business meetings. All the while flying under the radar producing QUALITY music with a following that needs no shine. No broads spittin about ass shakin,no dudes spittin about hittin,blingin,shootin,or any other mainstream packaged bullsh!t. Only strenghthening their argument combined with compiled evidence that you are to blame for the attempted murder of Hip Hop. That's right I said it,Rap did it.

As an 80's baby I am the epitome a 'DeWayne Wayne Kid'.The DeWayne Wayne Kids are that of the 'Y' generation aka(Echo Boomers or Millenials). Born smack dab in the middle of evolution. In 85 LL.Cool J. Salt& Pepa both made their debut. Flipped up shades and bent multi-color hats became the new,inspired by DeWayne Wayne a character on 'A Different World' hit show from 87-93. You can watch the migration of the show and see how the world around it was changing. From the sky-rocket in teenage pregnancy to the rise of young black America inflicting harm on each other.That was TV,imagine what it was like in real life. Hip Hop was there every step of the way.

During this time The GenYDWWKids running rampant,reeking havoc on anything they touched because to them,it was their right. In the time A Different World began and ended Salt & Pepa released their 3rd album LL Cool J was on his 5th.Artists like Heavy D,Snoop,and WuTang had just stepped on the scene,which only confirms and coincides with the almost blanketed conversion,union of Hop Hop and Rap during this time.It was almost as if we were provided a soundtrack of the time period,by each artist at that time. It was a true definition one that is almost eerie. Anyone not familiar can simply get up on the catalogs of lyricists from that era and almost feel as if they were there. If you were lucky enough to live in that time recants of that time frame,it takes you back.

In my opinion Hip Hop feeds your soul. It's the equivalent of your 1st love every time you press play. When the beat drops its similar to how your heart dropped when the phone rang and you hoped it was him. Hip Hop is an expression of love,real life scenarios,stories. Rap started out like that with lyricists such as Notorious B.I.G,Tupac & Snoop, and the whole Westside movement. Although Snoop was a direct product of NWA (Niggas With Attitude)'s Dr. Dre a group with a 'fuck the police'attitude. Really being the first "gangsta rap" squad on the scene,Snoop still provided more of a story behind his music. These masters of ceremonies are who started the race in Rap,they passed the baton to these youngins some where along the way and now every song is about 'chains,$,hoes,and cars'. For the Gen Y-DDWKids this is not something that is we can relate to. For not only are we just in the prime of our lives,most just graduating from college with six figures being a few years away. We come from a different genetic make-up. There was something in the water between 84-89,that bred some driven, individuals that look for more than the material things in life for we know there is something greater that lies ahead,something more structured form of existence that exceeds that of things that glimmer and shine.

That is how we approach our music also. If it isn't the greatest,with much quality and substance. We'll use your album as a coaster or a something to stabilize a crooked table in the crib. Come official when you present something to the Gen-Y DWW Kids because anything less than SUPERB is uncivilized. Many of us are trapped in a state of nostalgia when it comes to this music thing. We are constantly reaching for the past,something that will never re-surface. They say we must accept the new bogusness being blared through the radio waves,I say I've never settled in any aspect of my life and it for damn sure won't start with something I believe is my lifeline.

If Hip Hop won't show it's face, TeamHipHop will hunt him down. Underground emcees, fuel the greateness. Mae Day brings the MC Lyte back to the femcees,Common,Kweli,and Mos Def are the Godfathers of New Age Hip Hop in my book and those like Small Eyes and P.H.I.L.T.H.Y will be the ones to carry the torch when they retire. The newcomers are GenY-DWW Kids voice,most being born in the same time frame. They let TeamHipHop know it's not a dream,good music did once exsist and they are in position to ensure that it reclaims its thrown. At the top.

Bubble-gum,fad-following,trend-spotting,skinny-jean,tight-shirt wearing,puppy chow emcees will be but to sleep....SOON!!! The DWWKids are making a buzz underground that can no longer be ignored,you can't help but to recognize greatness.

Those 10yrs my senior tell me I don't know anything about hip hop,or the 80's.I tell them 'you must not know me'...

Hip Hops Main Chick


I've had a love affair with music since85. We've been through so much together. He's listened when no one else cared. Hip Hop shared the stories of change,war,death,and love with me. It seemed I was the first he notified of a new development in his life. Some where along the way that changed. We ran out of subjects to talk about, no good stories had been left untold. I expressed to him that my favorite times in life were when it was just he and I late night in my bedroom. Mom was sleep, all was
silenced throughout the halls of the crib. Only noise being made and heard coming from the last room on the left with the Ready to Die poster on the door. The sounds coming from the room,were enough to offend any one.However mama didn't mind because she knew what it was,she knew I loved him,and he loved me.


I'm sure by now I sound like a broken record,but the suicide of hip hop is hard for me to swallow. Born in 1985, I am the epitome of genuine hip hop. The perfect mixture of classic,indie,story telling,gangsta,sexy,romantic and all other horizons in between. When hip-hop had a meaning. You can pop in any Rakim,MC Lyte,Run DMC,Slick Rick or any other artist from the 80-90's and listen from the minute the baselines drops til the last snare goes out and you will be 3minutes more intelligent. They told you stories. For instance MC Lyte's 'Georgie Porgie' gives you the impression that this track is about a dude hollarin at a chick and her reciprocating the attention. However listen to that last 16 and you gain such a diffent message from it. Don't drink and drive. Lessons like that are not taught in music any more.The message sent through the ballads now is so featherweight.Meaningless is a better word to describe it.


The beginning of HipHop's demise started with groups such as D4L,Dem Franchize Boys,Souljah Boy,Bow Wow, and the rest of the whippasnappas with 'instructional dance moves' tracks. The quality of music diminished so rapidly. The industry got so caught up in the quantity of bogus groups,fads,dance steps and catchy tunes, they forgot that there is a demand and NEED for eminent music with foundation,background and substance. It used to be that you had to have talent to get a deal. Nowadays YouTube,Twitter,and MySpace present a platform that make is easy for the most talent-less individual to mock the thing I love whole-heartedly. It seems almost as if as long as you have a'Richard Simmons' feel to ya joints you're a shoo-in. It's such a disrespect and low blow to those that have come before us. Those that not only did not have BET/MTV/VH1 to promote their music,but had to wait in lines,have the door of radio stations and record lables repeatedly slammed in their faces. Hoping,praying for that one opprotunity to share their song.Sacrificing,leaving their blood,sweat and tears in the booth.

My only question is when will someone revive Hip-Hop???? He's been laying stagnant for far too long. Who is going to bring the beat,hook,and message to his bedside and show him there is still hope,that we still care? I know there are many underground artists with a thesis on the rise and fall of hip hop,we just have to hunt for them. Sometimes you have to dig deep,under all the chaos there is some sanity waiting to surface. I only hope that TeamRealHipHop has enough stamina and determination to stick it out for the long hall. We've been beat to a pulp,never giving up and attempting to counter every weak blow the industry has thrown at us,but we're tired. Someone,anyone please send a life raft this may be our final S.O.S.


Hip Hop told me he missed me. He said I've been gone too long. I told him I've been here,he's the one that's been on hiatus. He apologized profusely,and begged for my forgiveness. What am I to do? You just want me to pick up where we left off and ride off into the sunset?? I ask him. You left me for such a sub par situation,full of mediocre people that do not respect you and do not deserve your love. He replied with such passion in his voice and tears in his eyes and said "She tricked me,ma. I thought she was the real thing,when she fell ill I thought I could save her,I now see she was beyond resuscitation,nothing that I did no matter the love I gave she was headed for self-destruction"

Unheard Female Emcee




Will the REAL female emcee please stand up?!? Show your faces. The female rap game is so degraded and disrespected. It seems only chick getting her chance in the lime light is the one willing to show her ass and spit about other parts on her body. I guess I can't knock their hustle but where does that leave the chicks like I that just spit the real. shit you can feel. Not showing no skin or talking bout a mans sh!t either?


I blame Lil Kim,Foxy Brown and Trina for how low the bar has been set for women in the rap game. Emcees before the broads such as MC Lyte,Lauryn Hill,Queen LaTifah,Charlie Baltimore and Angie Martinez are what female lyricism is all about. They had a song that made you feel exactly what they were seeing. 'Ican do what you do easy,frontin niggas give me hee bee gee bees' is one of the rawest bars in hip-hop history to me and it was by a female. a chick. a woman. Lauryn Hill brought the noise every time she opened her mouth and graced the booth with her prescence. Vocally and lyrically. So when females get out here and talk about their private parts and what they can do,have done or will do with them it kind of offends me. Where's the class?

My homeboys tell me if I want to shine I'll have to sexy my rhymes up and show some skin. My response to them is: people across the nation are going to hear my 16's & love them. I refuse to degrade myself for a magazine cover. Another comment I get that offends me is: my flow needs a lil work.I don't mean to toot my own horn but,I'm killing most men out here and any female not bustin her coochee wide open doesn't hold a candle to me.

I loathe female lyricists not receiving the respect deserved because they don't demand it it. There needs to be a change in the delivery of these chicks,is all I'm saying. Its hard carrying this torch alone. But I'll do it. Hip hop is my husband and our babies name is music. I'll do anything to make sure he's represented and platformed like he need be.

Shaking ass,showing titts and talking bout giving dome is 97 low-grade chick emcee talk. Man up,get some class,be a f*ckin lady!

♥. I spit every 16 every bar from the soul any melody & harmony come from stories never told;♪isme

Rubix Cube Mind




Mind wrapped,warped and confused in this game we play called life, and Im not talking about the board game. Its funny how the experiences we face as children,adolescents, and young adults truly do set the tone for how we percieve situations we face.

I tend to be a pessimist. Always looking at the glass as half empty. I'm positive that has something to do with the cards I was dealt in this life. My fisade is that of a WonderWoman-like poise,because it has to be. The human race disappoints me more than a little bit. There are so many plastic,silicone people in the world. This pains me deeply because I try to remain 1000% genuine in everything I do. I just think its better to be YOU in this life. Why pretend to be something else? We all have faults and flaws those who cant except you for those need not be entertained. However deliberately walking through daily life pretending to be some one you are not is not acceptable.

Recently I was faced with the fact that people across the world are not cut from the same cloth as I. People often have two faces,in one way or another. Mine would be business and street savvy. Catch me at the gig and I'm "yes sir, dean cain sir' ,catch me just a minute after I clock out and my response to your hello will always be 'Whats gooood?" . You have to always conduct yourself in a professional manner when it is called for. In the street and business ventures I'm am always the same. ME. Why is that so hard for people to be who they are and love them for them? I could give 2 sh!ts if you approve of what I say or do,how I live,because at the end of the day I love me.

I guess what hurts most in life is finding out those who you've gone to war for and would do it again,end up being one of the plastics. Pachangas as Fabolous so eloquently put it on Loso's Way. Mama was right when she said in this life you'll be lucky to have 2 friends that are there with you through it all. I've been blessed to have a wonderful circle that will go to any lengths to make sure I'm protected,and respected and the love is reciprocated.

Message to the plastics in the world: GROW UP! look in the mirror and love who you are so you can stop faking,fronting,lying,and hating on the rest of us because you could only dream of being in our world. You make yourself look silly,while you promote me by constantly speaking my name. I appreciate it but I'm just looking out for you. Go have a hearty meal of peanut butter and jealous and wash it down with a tall glass of shut the f*ck up! Thanks doll,smooches.

Message to the real men and women: I see youout here grinding hard every day for your dream or just for success. Don't ever let anyone take that from you. Just because someone else doesn't believe in you doesn't mean you don't have to. Our horizon is just ahead. I'm convinced our determination and the hustle in our blood will have us walking in our dreams if we continue to focus and laugh in the face of adversity.

LIVE IN YOUR DREAMS <3

Tomboy Revamped


For as long as I can remember I've been one of the boys. Riding bikes,climbing trees,shadowing boxing and listening to their point of views on girls & women.Needless to say it has shaped and formed my opinion on men and the way I approach them in any aspect of my life. Relationships,friendships and business. The young men that have molded my 'tomboy' have set the bar of what a REAL man should be so high that any man ever involved with me need be prepared and only bring the best.


I feel most comfortable in a Jordan as opposed to a Stilleto and I feel that should be a decision that is respected by those outside looking in. I love being a woman but its sometimes overrated! Periods,hair,shaving,shopping,nail shops and etc.I've never been one to rock skirts,dresses,or heels.As a girl when I did decide to breakdown and 'girl-ize' and wear a skirt; a Timbaland or Air force One were my favorite accessory. Some where along the way it became apparent to me that society is not very accepting of a young woman that is a little rough around the edges.However I can only be me.

It's much more fun being one of the guys. Ripping and running the streets looking for something to fall into. Them talking about their hoes,me about the men and we only agree on one thing and that is 'f*ck em all we gettin paid'. Men are laid back. Go with the flow,hestitant to set-trip and slow to buck. While women on the other hand are constantly on a mission to destroy eachother. Women are eachothers worst critics. As opposed to uplifting their fellow woman they look for a reason...any reason to bash a beautiful,woman on the rise and instead of supporting her they are sure to add 120-130lbs of extra weight to her coat-tails.

This is something that has never sat well with me and no matter how much I try to understand it, I am lost in confusion. I've attempted to surround myself with as many women as I have men and the situation always ends in failure. Will women ever be able to accept,support and genuinely love and respect one another? It's quite pathetic to belittle ourselves with such petty arguments over men,fashion, or any other thing women can find a reason to cat about! It used to be that you would have to look search far and wide for a man that would cut another male down on his elevation to success and I am on the search for that among both sexes.

Woman on woman hate is quite ridiculous!! Running with the 'Y'chromosome all my life I've learned that talk is cheap. Words are just that,WORDS!Unless you intend on backing them up...shut up! Women bashing other women is just a display of their low self-esteem and self -hate within themselves. I guess it's human nature to speak negatively on any one elses progression in life if you are not happy with your own. Why then is the 'dream-bashing' minimized in a male circle?

I am always most supported and encouraged my male friends. They always look out and look for ways to further my success. However within my female circles I almost never encounter a support group when dreams,hopes or plans are revealed. Ive learned who I can and cannot share certain aspects of life with and the guys always prevail.

(CONCLUSION/RECAP)

So what have we learned boys and girls? I've learned thus far that;MEN ARE BETTER!!(Sorry ladies) They love sports,food,video games,music and women...just like me! (No I'm not a lesbian or bi-sexual,i just love to see a women on her grind making her dreams reality).LADIES:Men,don't want a broad or an average chick no nag-sessions or a catty-ass broad around.While you're thinking tearing down the woman he just broke his neck to look at, it is helping your case.He's thinking 'this is exactly the reason I got whiplash to see her.' Join in with your man when a beautiful woman is in or on your territory. He'll respect you more.Be conducive to the situation.As far as my species goes::: I've gained that If every woman would say something positive,every time she thought something negative about her fellow woman we'd take over this world!


<3...I can't lie and say its not intimidating becoming a young woman who actually dresses as one. I am loving the woman I am becoming,I am curious to see what and who I will ultimately become. But please don't get it twisted,because although I'm classy like a lady, I swear I'll beat ya ass!<3

Thursday, November 19, 2009



The way I see it: we were all given equal opprotunity for success. Yes everyone is born into different situations,struggles and tribulations, however our destiny lies within our own hands. This world is filled with culture,life and experience we all just have to be willing to go out and touch it.
I've never understood how or why an individual exerts energy to bash or put another being down. Is it that we feel so intimidated or so unhappy within ourselves that the only joy we get is from seeking the down fall of others? It is a disturbing reality to face,that even your support circle can sometimes be the ones wishing your demise. Even with that in place,it still remains very important to promote positivity. Thinking positive begots positive outcomes.

When I face a difficult situation that involves me encountering hate from another: I tell myself before I get angry; there is something in you that shines and they see that. Even when you are at your lowest point someone some where sees the great in you. If this person is someone with your greater good at heart,they will stop at nothing to ensure your success...but when its a hater,naysayer or hater in training they will go to all lengths to ensure your failure. Don't allow another human being that breathes,bleeds feels pain and happiness just like you to control your outlook or opinion on any situation,unless is stands to be a stepping stone to greater horizons.

This is my 1st entry I hope you enjoy it: Life is your oyster,own your pearl